How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

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Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

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How did the girl die? 25.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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A women president

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Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one Cool

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Justin Bieber is a good singer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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