What Happened to the man with no arms? Nothing, he continued his life with his daily routine of using his feet to accomplish his goals that day.

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What do you call a black priest? Father

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

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whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

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Justin Bieber got laid

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squirrels with massive bonerss

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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