Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

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What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

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Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

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Wade's the father

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What did the man with cancer do? Die

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How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

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Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

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What was everyone doing in the library? Reading

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Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

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Why was the black guy mad at the white guy? Duh, cause the black guy slapped the white guy.

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

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How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops