Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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why did the child go to hospital with 52 broken bones,lung and kidney failure,heart disease and cut off penis. because his mum threw a fridge at mikeanator_27

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Hope you all drop the soap in prison

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

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Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

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What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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