a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

The awkward moment when something of quite awkwardness occurs.

Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

What's the difference between a duck?

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

How do asians chop their food? CHOPSTICKS! Moral: Yeah that one sucked... ON PURPOSE! Now you dont have to feel inferior ALL the time, you feel equal even though you arent! Ill allow you :D

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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