A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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