Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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