What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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