Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

9/11 my birthday

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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