what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

Your big dick.

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...