Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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