A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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