You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

an emo girl walked into a white room

There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...