Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

A black guy. A Jew and a dyke died in a plane crash!:) Who was flying? ....why would you be wondering that when you should be wondering why i put a smile-face beside the details of the crash..

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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