How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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