- Anti Joke

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

25

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

I asked her where you were.

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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