What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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i saw amango it splootered

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops