Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Ross.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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A man name Bill works 12 hours a day at a warehouse, almost everyday a week. It is a hard job but Bill does it to support his beautiful wife of many years. Bill thinks the long hard days are worth every moment he gets to spend with her. One night, after a hard day, he comes home to find another man in bed with his wife. Bill begins to sob and yell "I work 12 hours a day at a warehouse....." His wife yells back. "We already read this part, get to the punchline".

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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