What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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