WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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