ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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I'm tired.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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