What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Women.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

Blacks

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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