I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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