Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

Read a Book.

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

Indians

Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...