what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

black people swimming

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What's big and messy? A big mess

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

men, men like men= men+bed

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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