What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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