Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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