Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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