Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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