Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

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KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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