steven hawking walks into a bar

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

Yellow People !!

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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