why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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