What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

What's black, white, and red all over? Road Kill Penguins.

Actually it was me Josh brown

What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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