star wars kid

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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