Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

why was kade sad? he shit himself

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

Get on the boat.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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