At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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