What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

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Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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do you wanna hear a joke school

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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What's yellow and talks? A talking giraffe.

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What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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