Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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