Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

Half life 3 confirmed

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...