What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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A whole 'nother.

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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