How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

*Science Teacher goes into his class* Teacher:MR MCAAAAAAAN! What's the answer?! MrMccann: I dunno sir. Teacher: WHAT DO YA MEAN YA DUNNO?! HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO?! MrMcann: No Teacher:Then answer this. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER?!

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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