what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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star wars kid

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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