And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

Why are they the "living" daylights?

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

There was a fat man crying. I just told him the local Mc D's was arson attacked.

Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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