What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

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What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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The child was fired from his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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