Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

Yes

Tunechi

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...