A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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