what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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What's the differnce of victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and others were raped then killed. Kelvin Yang.

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops