There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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you will like this because i am black.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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