A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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