What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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TRICERATOPS!

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops