Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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How old are you? 7

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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