Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Fat? Jesse Z

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There once was this guy and he fell down

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

thumb_up thumb_down -3

you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops