Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

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alert('The Game')

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops