Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

thumb_up thumb_down -12

BIG MAC'S

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops