A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

Tony Romo

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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