what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops