What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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This is a joke.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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